Is the family being victimized? How do you determine this?

Abusive people only see things from their own perspective which is how they build their arguments. So, when we’re dealing with any kind of abuse, we have to remember that it is about a manipulator who is being deceptive with and undermining another.

Worse, when we’re dealing with abusive acts, offenses or crimes involving Emotional Abuse such as spousal or elder abuse, we’re also never dealing with only one victim. By definition, anyone can become vulnerable to the manipulations of a perpetrator of such unjust or unlawful actions and they do, unknowingly. And yes, there are clues that would alert the intelligent and aware, but when most come up against these types of offenders, most are tricked into ignoring their gut feelings and chose to overlook the obvious signs. When this happens, most people will then always make the same mistake. They will, unknowingly, almost always end up helping the offender.

So what does being tricked have to do cases going unreported?

Giving the perception that, for example, Elder Abuse is about sibling rivalry is how the perpetrators go about concealing their actions and how these actions are not perceived as such, so that, even the unlawful acts that do justify intervention don’t get reported. And it’s where the perpetrators quietly, and deceptively, gather support that helps them cover up their offenses or crimes.

Ultimately, what happens then, in the midst of all of this, is that anyone who tries to report a suspected perpetrator ends up being outshouted and painted as a troublemaker and their cries for help and their legitimate claims of “elder abuse” that are pointed at the perpetrator get drowned out, dismissed or ignored. When this happens, its obvious to the intervener that the one and only chance they had to help the elder has come and gone. No one really ever gets a second change in these types of situations. When this happens, the perpetrators know they’ve won again. Read more…

All abusers use the same strategy…

Why don’t victims see it coming before it’s too late? 

The problem is that, unless you remain detached in any type of relationship, anyone can be victimized without even being aware that they are being drawn into an abusive type of relationship.

And, contrary to popular belief, before one is aware of the signs of an abusive relationship, then it’s likely the person is in a spot where they can’t or they won’t be able to fight back. If you see the signs, then that means that the situation is well past the initial stages and the person you are with has been able to gain a position of power or control over you, that is likely to be detrimental to you as well as anyone they feel poses a threat to them while they wish to remain in the relationship with you, the victim.

Helping victims and families or protecting oneself from being caught up in an emotionally abused relationship will depend on things other than blatant, obvious signs of abuse. It’ll be more about:

  1. understanding the general nature and traits of an unhealthy relationship, especially the beginning stages of one, that can lead to an abusive relationship;

  2. understanding how perpetrators of Emotional Abuse and Emotional Elder Abuse lure their victims into abusive relationships.

Ideally, the key to stopping Emotional Abuse or Emotional Elder Abuse is about being able to identify the perpetrator before they get a foot near you or a foot inside your home.

In other words, being aware of how they gain control and how they apply “disguised pressure” on their victims to reprogram them and disable them completely before anyone is aware this is happening is vital in detecting both the perpetrator and the crime.

All perpetrators use the same strategy on everyone, whether its to conceal their identity, conceal their actions or proteall of their targeted victims and r strategy and knowing how they use certain control tactics to accomplish this.

Did you know this…

What happens to someone to get to a point where they accept being beaten, or seem to be helpless to do anything about it, is not just about being yelled at or bullied,

To commit their crimes, perpetrators rely on:

1) people’s fear for their own safety;

2) people’s respect for elder;

3) due dilligence not being done.

Where mistakes are made:

1) In the first 30 seconds of meeting up with a perpetrator of the crime;

3) being able to get people to cede power to them without being aware of it happening.

Reporting abuse:

  • Does not stop abuse nor solve it;

  • is made worse for the elder if the situation is misread and subsequently dismissed as family dysfunction.

Mostly all of these types of situations are very manageable and easy to turn back around. It means understanding what is happening in a split second it does and taking action immediately to avoid all negative backlash.

All offenders of Emotional Abuse use a standard blueprint or strategy to plan their crimes. To manage the situation, one has to understand this strategy before any useful neutralization of the situation can happen.

For victims and their families…

It is almost impossible for family, friends, neighbors, caregivers, legal profession or even private investigators to find out if an elder is being victimized if they do not know what to look for.

Everyone, in most cases, will be sensing something is wrong, or off, but not what exactly. And in most cases, even if there is a strong indication that the elder is indeed in trouble, it will be very difficult for anyone to get any help. And unfortunately, everyone is looking for obvious evidence of it.

With no evidence, many professionals do not feel comfortable taking any steps forward, as it most likely comes at a risk to their own well-being.

When dealing with Emotional Elder Abuse, unfortunately, all perpetrators move very quickly and know exactly what they can or cannot do legally.

It is a fact that perpetrators Emotional Abuse or Emotional Elder Abuse will not allow themselves to be confronted or present in the same room with their targets/victims. Normally, perpetrators of Emotional Abuse send representatives to court, if it even gets that far. Normally, they literally run from any situation where they know they have no control over the proceedings.

In order to circumvent any actions by perpetrators in the attempt to avoid accountability in any sense of the word, a claim can be brought against both the victim and the perpetrator is to counteract any such moves.

They also know that most people do not question why the elder is making a request. Nor do they consider if the elder is being unduly influenced. They just simply do what the elder asks of them….And this is how fraud takes place.

What you have to know…

Know this about the crime of Emotional Elder Abuse and the offenders, if you do chose to leave your aggressor or merely challenge them to get back any type of control over yourself or your situation will mean that:

  • You do have to figuratively speaking, keep shoving back every time you get pushed;
  • You do have to show them you mean to stand up for yourself. Once they understand this, they will reconsider whether its worth staying in the relationship with you or not;
  • In most cases, they may leave you but they will relinquish their need to keep or maintain or gain back control over you;

  • You do ALWAYS have to be on your guard and fully prepared before you take any plan of action you;

  • Offenders will act in accordance to how they perceive a threat i.e. they will put more pressure on you, their victim, hoping that you do tire of challenging them.